Oct 14, 2010

Re-occuring nightmares

I'm recycling this post I posted awhile ago and using it for one of the prompts for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.

As I've mentioned before, I usually have some weird dreams...when I decide I'm going to remember them.
For the past month now, I've been having 2 re-occurring dreams.
One can be read here.
The other one just haunts me after I wake up and throughout the day, and just chills me to the bone.

I'm in my apartment and I have some friends over.
I'm having a dinner party, and everyone is laughing and having a good time, glasses of wine sitting around and being sipped on by my friends.
It's really sunny outside and I open the sliding glass door to feel the sun on my face while I'm waiting for the timer to go off for the roast.

As soon as I open the door, the sky goes black and it's dark and cold.
I look around and everyone is lifeless, not talking, and the wine is gone.
I check the oven, but the food is not there. I ask everyone what is happening and they look at me and tell me to be quiet or "they" will hear us.
I ask them who "they" are, when someone comes crashing through the window with weapons. I can't exactly see what the weapons are, but I know they have them.

We all run to my room, but "they" are fast. One guy is in my room and laughing at us. Saying we aren't going to trick him.
I'm so delirious at this point and don't know what's going on. All I know is that I need to get everyone safe and I need to do it fast.
I notice I have a pair of scissors in my hands and I somehow break free from the group in my room and run down the hall into my living room and I jump on the couch.
One of the guys is really fast and meets me there. He jumps on me and is trying to kill me.
Somehow I get him flipped over and I'm behind him. I take my scissors and I stab him in the side, exactly like I know where to hit him so I puncture his lung.
Everyone with "them" see what happens and they all get scared and run off from where they came, leaving the guy I killed behind.

This is where I wake up and I'm crying. It feels so real and I'm scared out of my mind when I wake up.
Aaron usually has to tell me it's going to be ok, but what he doesn't know is, it's not ok in my mind.

I remember EVERY detail of the dream...down to the facial expression of the man who I kill in my dream.
I've never been able to remember faces in my dreams. I know who the person is, just by "knowing", but I've never seen a detail of the face.

What is wrong with me??

These dreams are scaring me so bad, I don't want to sleep at night.
Does anyone know of a place where I can maybe get my dreams interpreted or does anyone know how?
I'm open to anything.


Marla said...

That certainly is a terrifying dream. And the fact that it's recurring. Yikes! Wish I could help you interpret it. But I'm at a loss. I have frequent negative dreams. My recurring ones usually involve either a plane crash or a bear chasing me. Weird. I wish I knew what it all meant.

Why can't I dream of rainbows and puppies and unicorns?!? Sigh.

JustMom420zaks said...

I know a little about dreams so maybe I can help. A bad dream like this can be scary, but it helps to know what your subconcious is telling you.
Bad guys or monsters chasing or attacking you, usually means that you have something in your life that seems big and forbidding and hard to tackle (eg. a presentation, a project, or simply the difficult task of raising these kids!)
You attacking the badguy and killing him, chasing off the others symbolizes you facing this problem and succeeding (making the presentation, doing a good job by your kids... etc.)
So by chasing these scary things away from you and your dinner guests, you are mentalizing yourself succeeding at the huge, scary task ahead of you.
In essence, this may be a scary dream, but it's a good one, because it means you have faith in your ability to beat a huge and forbidding task set before you.
I have a similar dream, but i'm not so lucky. When the bad guy/ monster chases me, I can't run very fast... when he catches me, I open my mouth to scream and nothing comes out... I turn to fight, and all of my actions are weak and ineffective. Which means I have a severe fear of failure.
Knowing exactly where to stab the bad guy, means you know exactly what to do to solve your problem. So this is a GOOD dream, albeit a frightening one.
And thats my dream psychology for today. :)

Anonymous said...

Stopped by from Mamakat's workshop. Your recurring nightmare is indicative of a deep fear of losing someone/something dear to you. You take a stab at the fear in the dream but do not fully face it. You know it but don't see it as you'd like the fear to leave on it's own. Visualize a lighter outcome before you settle in to sleep and send messages to yourself that the outcome will be positive and the fear healed. I studied dreams in another phase of my life. Great post!

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